Making New Friends 101

Daily Health Tips update for July 1:

As we get older, we find it’s harder to make new friends. Many people end up married and get busy with their husbands, wives and children, so friendships get put on the back burner and sometimes even dissipate.

For hundreds of years philosophers and scientists have said that people need to be with other people. Not only do people who have friends live longer, happier lives, but it boosts their immunity and they’re less likely to fall into depression.

Sounds great, but how do I make new friends? The good news is it’s never too late to start making friends. Check out these tips on cultivating new friendships and see which of them work for you.

• Just show up. The key here is to never turn down an invitation. Go to the party, accept the invite to the picnic, RSVP yes to the wedding. If you make the effort, people will see you as social and willing to receive friends.

• Join a group. It doesn’t matter which group, just make sure it’s something you’re at least a little interested in. Making new friends is like setting up dominoes—when the first one falls there’s usually a chain reaction. If you can make one new friend, chances are there are more to follow.

• Make your own group. Ok, maybe “Construction Workers Anonymous” isn’t for you, but that doesn’t give you an excuse to sit back and wait for something to find you. Figure out the things you like to do and send out an invite for the first meeting. Tell the people you’re inviting to bring one friend each and you might actually have a little party on your hands. This is how book clubs, gourmet food groups, etc., get started.

• Say nice things about others. It may seem odd, but when you trash talk others, the person you are talking to will subconsciously associate you with the words coming out of your mouth. For example if you say Sally is a liar to your friend Joan, Joan may start to associate lying with you. Not only is gossip an undesirable quality in a friend, it makes you look bad to others. If you don’t have anything nice to say … (you can take it from here).

• Set a target. This sounds slightly calculating, but the truth is if we can visualize something in our own minds, we’re more likely to reach the goal in real life. Figure out how many new friends you’d like to make and then go out and do it!

Source: womansday.com